Thursday, November 5, 2009

"Ment to be"

So adoption is complicated and has me thinking lots about deep and complicated situations. One of the things that has been on my thoughts lately is the phrase "this child was ment to be with our family." I have read the writings of adult adoptees on this very subject and they really struggle with how could an all good all loving God allow their birth family and themselves to suffer such a loss. I have been thinking on this and trying to sort this all out in my mind. I have come to the following conclusion. God is all good but we as people are not. He knows that we will make mistakes he knows that the birth families of children placed for adoption will not be able to parent them. Does that make it right? I don't think so. Does it make it part of his plan for the life of those involved I think so. I feel that God knows what will happen in our lives before it will happen. That does not eliminate our chances to choose for ourselves because we still can choose. For example if I know Miles is going to do something that doesn't mean he has to do it just that he will. So here are my feeling on if Abeni is "ment to be with our family."

1. God loves Abeni, her birth family, and our family.

2. God wants what is best for all of us.

3. God knows how Abeni will come to our family. He knows that there is hurt involved in that situation.

4. God does not want for any of his children to hurt.

So I think that it is part of God's plan for Abeni that she come into our family. I don't like the phrase "ment to be" because for me it oversimplifies a complicated situation.


Kelly said...

VERY well put, Ari! Totally agree. :o)

ElizabethH said...

well said. :)