Thursday, September 8, 2011

Loving an adopted child



I have spoken with a few families interested in adoption recently and they have expressed concern about weather they could love an adopted child the same way they love their biological child or children. Let me tell you about my experience. Here is a shocker it isn't the same! It changes everything!!! You will never love any of your children "the same" again! Your love will intensify. After you have fought tooth and nail, and after you have missed milestones, after you have loved a child you have never met, after you have loved a grieving child, you will love your biological and adopted children MORE. Never again can you take for granted the sound of their little feet in the morning or the feeling of their little arms around their neck. You will learn to treasure those kisses and smiles those simple things like a tight grip on YOUR hand when YOUR baby is scared. Did you know it was an honor to comfort your child. Sure you did in theory but now you have learned that in reality. Here are some pics of Abeni's homecoming. Yes I love all of my children MORE because of the lessons of adoption.

 
 

5 comments:

Dizzy said...

Ari, this is so beautifully written. You have put into words something I have also felt, but never been able to express to others. Adoption really does make you pay attention to the little things. Thanks you.

Sarah B said...

This is SUCH a personal issue and I would tell anyone who has concerns about it to REALLY think it over...Honestly, bonding with a biological baby and then an adopted baby have been so different for me and that has been hard for me to reconcile. As difficult as pregnancy was for me, it promoted much quicker bonding - something having to do with being physically together all that time and those pregnancy/breastfeeding hormones too, I think. It is different for everyone. I'm happy to hear that this didn't seem to be the case for you. It is a different road, but I think we're finally getting there bonding-wise. It is so interesting to hear what other people's experiences are with this!

The Hamblin's said...

You should write a book :) You are... and always have been... such a good example! Abeni is one lucky girl :)

Christy said...

Beautiful, amazing post. Thank you for sharing it.

Mark and Lindsey Anderson said...

Wow, that was an awesome post! Thanks for sharing! It was fun to see you guys in December when we had dinner with your family!